awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
This is the prime rib incident all over again
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
