Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
