i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
