I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
