It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Randomize
