So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
3 2 1 whiskey
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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