I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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