She's JV to your varsity
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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