he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
