Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
