I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
