You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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