Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
