Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
