you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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