if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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