do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
please come you make the beer taste better
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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