my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
