there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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