I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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