Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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