Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
