Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
