Already got asked if we're dating
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
