i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize
