After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
