I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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