Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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