I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
