You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
