Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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