I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I have tasted many bathrooms
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
