This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
