I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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