Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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