i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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