I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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