how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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