So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
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