with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
she peed on how many people?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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