Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize