How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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