Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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