YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
The power of my boobs compel you
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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