The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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