So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
