When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
