Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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