i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
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