i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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